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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23552272">You Can't Teach a Monkey to Read</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/SilentWaves/pseuds/SilentWaves'>SilentWaves</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>One Piece</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Family Feels, Gen, I thought this was going to be pure crack... and... it's not, It's not angsty either it's more... just the fam being a good fam?, Monkey D. Luffy Being An Idiot, Monkey D. Luffy Can't Read, Monkey D. Luffy Loves His Friends, Mugiwara no Ichimi | Straw Hat Pirates, Mugiwara no Ichimi | Straw Hat Pirates As Family</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-04-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-04-09</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-02 17:27:07</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>General Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,071</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23552272</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/SilentWaves/pseuds/SilentWaves</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Luffy can't read. Nami worries that it will put him in harm's way once they reach the New World.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Monkey D. Luffy &amp; Everyone</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>6</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>80</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>You Can't Teach a Monkey to Read</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>whewwww it has been a Solid Minute since I last wrote something for One Piece. Don't get me wrong, it's literally my favourite series ever, but I always worry that I mess up on the characterization or the wonderful world that Oda created for us.</p>
<p>But I'm pretty happy with how this one turned out! No shipping, just strawhat fam being a cool fam.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Before you depart for the New World,” Rayleigh says solemnly. “Are you aware that Luffy can’t read?”</p>
<p>Rayleigh found out at an unfortunate time, when Luffy was still recovering from the grief of losing a brother. He had shown his trainee the newspaper that spread the word to his friends across the world, and realized that Luffy couldn’t understand the words after he didn’t read any further into his only tie with his friends.</p>
<p>He was conflicted whether he should pry or not, since it may have been a sensitive subject, though he finally relented one and a half years later, before his departure.</p>
<p>Maybe he’s still recovering from the shock of it all, but he’s had to confirm with every one of Luffy’s crew members as they passed by Shakky’s bar. He wasn’t sure what he was expecting as a response, but he’s gotten the same reaction every time. It was a moment of confused silence, and then a nod not two seconds later, with them mumbling something along the lines of <em>well, that would explain that time…”</em> followed by some ridiculous story about their captain that wouldn’t be expected from the infamous Strawhat Crew.</p>
<p>Even the more serious ones, like Roronoa Zoro or Nico Robin,  just shrugged while smiling sheepishly, and departed to explore the island.</p>
<p>It might be Rayleigh’s old age catching up to him, but in his years literacy has always been a necessity. And even in modern times, it was generally much better to have learned how to read, whether as a child or as an adult, since the information attained from newspapers was almost as powerful as the strength in one’s fists.</p>
<p><em>’Perhaps he has his crewmates summarize the articles for him? That would make sense, since he seems to have the shortest attention span in his own crew… But then, would he even bother hearing about the contents if he wasn’t interested enough to learn to read in the first place?’</em> Rayleigh was lost in thought until the Marines arrived. <em>Ah well,</em> he shrugs. <em>Roger had some difficulties as well.</em></p>
<hr/>
<p>“So,” Nami says while they were descending to Fishman Island, “I heard it from Rayleigh, but I just want to check. Luffy, can you actually not read?”</p>
<p>“Nope!” Came Luffy’s cheerful reply. He got the crew’s attention now—even Zoro had his one eye open. “Too many characters. Can’t remember them all.”</p>
<p>“But didn’t your Grandpa ever force you to learn it?” Usopp asks. “I thought it was a requirement to get into the Marines?”</p>
<p>“It is,” Nami says, because she recalls Bellemere using that to convince her and Nojiko to read when, at the time, Nami has been more interested in drawing elevation lines to bother with the characters that labelled them, and Nojiko had learned how to plant tangerines just fine without the use of a written manual, so she didn’t bother picking up the botany books detailing the fertilizer needed for their growth.</p>
<p>It was one of the best decisions of their lives to learn the alphabets and complex lines that made up the written word. And Nami was more than a little peeved that Luffy never bothered to learn it for himself. </p>
<p>“Uh, I dunno,” Luffy considered Usopp’s question for a moment, of which the crew remained uncharacteristically silent so as to not miss his answer. “I guess I forgot?”</p>
<p>“Well, he <em>is</em> probably the dumbest being on board,” Sanji says good-naturedly. “And that’s taking into account the fish in the aquarium.”</p>
<p>Robin laughs a bit, which sends Sanji into another nosebleed fit. “I wouldn’t say that Luffy is ‘dumb’, per say. He is simply the type of person whose fists act faster than his mind.”</p>
<p>“Yeah, we got a few other types like that, wouldn’t you say?” Franky gives Zoro a pointed look, of which the effect is enhanced since his massive metal body needs to turn to accommodate the move. “Except he’s more ‘<em>swing</em> first, talk later’”</p>
<p>“Picking a fight now?” Zoro grins, though without any motion to reach for his swords or bandana. “Careful—don’t think that your metal is going to offer any protection from my blades.”</p>
<p>“Even him!” Nami says. “Sure, he has muscles for brains, but at least Zoro reads a newspaper every now and then.” She points to Luffy. “Luffy, you’re fantastic, and we all love you, but I <em>am</em> curious about how the grandson of the Hero of the Marines and the son of Dragon the Revolutionary manages to be as airheaded as you! If we get caught in any traps because you get tricked by someone, then I <em>will</em> throw you overboard!”</p>
<p>“Aw, Nami wouldn’t actually do that, Luffy!” Chopper says. “You don’t need to worry at all, and I think you’re plenty strong even if you can’t read!”</p>
<p>Nami <em>hmmph</em>s, and looks down at him. “Well, sure, we’ve been fine so far, but we already know how strong the Four Emperors are! They’re sure to have manipulative allies that can totally use this to lure you into a trap!”</p>
<p>“Then I’ll just break out!” Luffy smiles, as though he just solved the problem. “Besides, I eat a lot, so I’m strong <em>and</em> smart!”</p>
<p>Nobody said anything, but they were all thinking that it was probably Ace who fed Luffy those lies. They didn’t know his relation to Luffy at the time, but it was really Sabo who decided to play this little prank. </p>
<p>“Well, sure…” Chopper mutters. “Maybe like a placebo effect, but…?” He began jotting down notes in a notepad. He’s about ready to retract his earlier statement—he was beginning to wonder how Luffy survived while he was on his own.</p>
<p>Nami looks at Chopper retreating to his office, mostly to gather treatment for Sanji’s newly-developed condition, but also to start a new study on how Luffy miraculously lived to be 19 years old. He probably wouldn’t be getting out of there anytime soon, and Nami could consider him effectively out of the conversation.</p>
<p>“But think about it,” Usopp says while tending to his newly-planted seeds. “Doesn’t this explain that time after we left Alabasta?” </p>
<p>Sanji sighs, “I miss Vivi…” The crew nods in agreement. “But I don’t know what you’re talking about, since I was likely cooking at the time.”</p>
<p>“Nah, you were busy fawning over Robin,” Zoro had closed his eyes, so everyone assumed he went back to sleep, though he was apparently just resting his eyes. </p>
<p>Sanji began fuming. Evidently, two years apart weren’t enough to quell their tumultuous relationship. Rivalry? The crew still wasn’t sure. “Well, excuse me for <em>appreciating a lovely woman when I see one.</em>”</p>
<p>“You call <em>that</em> appreciation?” Zoro retorts, eye open and swords unsheathed now. </p>
<p>They continued arguing, and Nami decided that they were most likely no longer taking part in the discussion. She sighs, because she’s sure that a decent amount of the remaining brain cells in this crew rests with her. And Robin, of course. And Chopper, probably, <em>hopefully</em>, since he’s their only medically trained professional.</p>
<p>“We’re getting off track,” Nami says, more to herself than anyone else. “Luffy, Usopp is talking about how we decided to write anonymous letters to Vivi after we left. We scrapped the idea, since people would likely get suspicious and we’d be putting her in danger.”</p>
<p>“Yeah, I remember.” Luffy nods, though his confused stare suggests otherwise. </p>
<p>“You wanted to tell her about how much you enjoyed your adventures together.” Robin says. </p>
<p>“Yeah, that was when we showed the ‘X’!” Luffy says, clearly proud of himself. He traces the ghost of the mark where it used to sit on his arm, a habit that they all picked up after leaving Alabasta, especially when Vivi came up in conversation.</p>
<p>“It was after that.” Nami sits down on the Sunny’s lawn. She’s sure that the boat also feels sympathy for her cause, since the Sunny was reasonable like that. “When we decided that the ‘X’ wasn’t a long-enough goodbye.”</p>
<p>“I don’t say goodbye!” Luffy says. “Because I’m gonna see everyone again!”</p>
<p>“We know, Luffy,” Robin says, remembering how she heard him say the exact same thing to many of their allies that they made. “And we agree. But that doesn’t change the fact that you asked why we were drawing such a bad picture of Vivi.”</p>
<p>“You should have at least recognized them as letters!” Usopp says. “Even if you can’t read them, they didn’t look at all like they were meant to be a portrait!”</p>
<p>“Well, there is not too much to praise about Luffy’s artistic talent, now is there?” Brook says. He usually enjoys listening to their discussions of the past, since he was the most recent addition to the crew, but he couldn’t help himself from sharing a quip here and there.</p>
<p>“Ugh, I was hungry, and my stomach made me see things.” Luffy says. “And I’m always hungry, so that’s probably what happened.”</p>
<p>“Alright.” Franky says. “Let’s say, for the sake of argument, that you were hallucinating a bit then, though I wasn’t there to prove or disprove this whole story. But then what about that time in Thriller Bark?”</p>
<p>“Oh! I’m familiar with this one!” Brook says. “And I remember well, even though I don’t have a brain!” He laughs at his own joke. “You went around tasting everything in the kitchen when we told you we needed salt!”</p>
<p>“That’s how I always find stuff!” Luffy protests. “And it worked, didn’t it?”</p>
<p>“It had ‘SALT’ right on the label!” Usopp says, looking up from a particularly picky plant that wasn’t taking in any water. “And we found it before you did, so no, it didn’t work. Reading was a lot faster in the end.”</p>
<p>Luffy gets the same face that he gets whenever he thinks he has a brilliant idea. He looks around to see if Sanji and Zoro finished their bout. Clangs and shouts gave him his answer. “So do you think Sanji labels food in the same way?” Luffy lowers his volume to what he probably thinks is a whisper.</p>
<p>“He labels by nutrition category. Why?” Franky asks. “Oh, wait…” He gets his answer when Luffy begins salivating.</p>
<p>“Don’t worry, Franky.” Nami assures him. “Luffy would eat all of our rations whether he can read or not.”</p>
<p>“I don’t eat <em>all</em> of our rations!” Luffy argues. “I leave a few bits for you guys!”</p>
<p>“Yeah, the amount that’s left to scrape off the bones…” Usopp grumbles, since he was the primary victim to Luffy’s dinner table food theft.</p>
<p>Nami sighs, looking at the ocean. “We’re already approaching the deeper ocean currents, and we still don’t know how Luffy’s remained illiterate all this time.”</p>
<p>“Don’t worry about it, Nami.” Robin says comfortingly. “We’ve gotten this far, right? And we’ve relied on his heart and his strength much more than we have on his mind. That’s what the crew is for.”</p>
<p>“Yeah, but what if we ever need to send him a written message? What if there’s a really manipulative, smart guy in the New World and Luffy ends up in trouble?” Nami knows that she’s worrying a bit more than she should be. This was <em>Luffy</em>, after all. He freed her from Arlong. He freed Alabasta from Crocodile. He broke into and out of the most well-guarded prison in the world.</p>
<p>But he’s also the brother that Nami never had. And literacy doesn’t mean that much to her; she barely needs to read outside of the news or maps. But it just seems so <em>essential</em>, and <em>mandatory</em>, and one of the most <em>basic</em> skills for survival. </p>
<p>She sighs. “You’re right, Robin. I don’t know, I just worry sometimes.”</p>
<p>“That’s what makes us a family!” Luffy says, bringing her, Robin, Franky, Usopp, and Brook into a rubbery hug. “We look out for each other!”</p>
<p>“And we’ll cover each others’ weaknesses.” Franky says. </p>
<p>“That’s what we trained so much these past two years for.” Usopp adds.</p>
<p>“And I’m sure if Sanji and Zoro were here instead of sparring like delinquents, they would agree.” Brook says.</p>
<p>“And Chopper’s sure to be missing out on an all-crew hug, won’t you agree?” Robin asks.</p>
<p>“And with all of us back together, we’re gonna conquer the New World and find the One Piece!” Luffy looks at Nami expectantly for her agreement.</p>
<p>After a beat, Nami sighs. “Yeah,” she smiles. “But I still think you should pick up a book every now and then.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thanks for reading! Let me know what you thought in the comments, whether it be positive or otherwise!</p>
<p>You can chat with me on <a href="https://voicelesswaves.tumblr.com/">Tumblr</a>, where I'm pretty active!</p></blockquote></div></div>
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